Roskam, Renacci Make World Series Bet
Wheaton, IL — On the eve on the Chicago Cubs’ first World Series appearance since 1945, U.S. Representatives Peter J. Roskam (R-IL) and Jim Renacci (R-OH) are placing a friendly wager on the outcome of the Fall Classic.
Rep. Roskam, who represents the western and northwestern suburbs of Chicago, has agreed to provide Chicago-style deep-dish pizza from Gino’s East in the unlikely event the Cubs lose the series. Rep. Renacci, whose district includes the western suburbs of Cleveland, will send over corned beef sandwiches from Slyman’s with Bertman Original Ball Park Mustard once the North Siders are crowned World Champions. It remains to be determined whether or not Trevor Bauer’s drone will be made available to deliver the goods.
The loser has also agreed to wear a tie representing the winning team and extol the virtues of the winning city at an upcoming Ways & Means Committee hearing. Rumor has it Javier Baez will testify on efforts to combat Medicare fraud – no, seriously, the man can catch anything.
Rep. Roskam released the following statement:
“We invented skyscrapers, improv comedy, and the Ferris Wheel – plus we figured out how to turn a hot dog into a hearty meal. I think Joe, KB, Rizz, and our Cubbies can handle the boys from the Mistake on the Lake. Also – just saying – we dye our river green intentionally.”
Rep. Renacci released the following statement:
"In case my good friend from Chicago hasn't heard, Cleveland is now the City of Champions. It began this summer with the Cavs stunning the world to beat the heavily favored Warriors and the Tribe will end the year upsetting the still cursed Cubs. Lindor, Kipnis, Kluber, and rest of the gang will make sure that we will have one more Party at Napoli's to celebrate another Championship in the City of Cleveland."